Confronting Biases
Acknowledging your biases is the first step.
The biases we are addressing today can be defined as feelings, thoughts, and preferences that are in favor of or are against a person/group/ demographic. We all have biases (no matter how kind-hearted and open-minded you are) therefore, we all have room for improvement in this area.
Why are we as humans naturally inclined to biases?
We each see/process the world through our own filters and we assume the information we gather is factual. We use that information to classify, describe, and make better sense of things. Sometimes these biases are helpful, for example you might be biased towards one brand of appliances because their products are durable and inexpensive.
But relying on biases is harmful when used to judge and interact with other people, and we mustn’t mistake these stereotypes for truths.
Implicit Vs Explicit Bias
Implicit biases are those of which we have little to no awareness, whereas explicit biases are held consciously.
Both types of biases put one at risk for acting in discriminatory ways towards an individual or group that they negatively consider. Obviously, explicit biases are harder to unlearn, but research indicates that implicit biases can be managed and reduced by acknowledging and discussing them. (Understanding Bias: A Resource Guide)
So let’s talk about it! Our relationships with ourselves and society benefit when we confront our biases and work to change them.
*** If you’re curious about your own implicit biases, you can take a test here ***
Imagine a buffet (…mmm…buffet…) or a feast such as Thanksgiving. Do you only select the same one or two dishes, or is part of the joy in experiencing multiple recipes, flavors, textures?
Examples of Biased Reactions
- You find yourself rolling your eyes at your kids’ friend who now identifies as non-binary.
- When you pass by a homeless person, the label “loser” comes to mind
- You’ve taken dolls away from your nephew and asked him to play with a ball.
- You turn up your nose at the plus-sized models on TV.
- You ignore input from an elderly coworker because you assume she isn’t current enough.
- You think that people who complain about being poor should just work harder
- You are checking out in the grocery store and become annoyed at the family behind you in line speaking in a foreign language.
- You instinctively clutch your purse as you walk near a man of another race, though you hadn’t when a man of your own race brushed by you even closer
***You decide: Which of these biases are implicit and which are explicit?***
The Trouble with Excusing or Ignoring Biases
The assumptions above may seem harmless (Who cares what I’m thinking as long as I keep it to myself, right?) But when we excuse or ignore biases, we give them the potential to evolve into prejudiced actions (which are bad btw…just making sure we are all on the same page here…)
Biases left unchecked shut us off from learning and experiencing the treasures of diversity. In the United States, our diversity is the essence of American greatness, and we ought to use our privilege to delve into the myriad cultures that are right in our backyard. When we fail to correct our biases, we inwardly or overtly exclude opportunities to connect with, learn from, and even love an array of (mostly marginalized) individuals, groups, and experiences. This sets us up to demonize victims, and to fall prey to corrupt leaders who use biases to manipulate followers through separation and fear tactics.
Our biased thoughts shape our responses, our actions, and in turn our actions shape our thoughts. For example, if you have a bias (thought) against Mexicans, you might be rude or standoffish in your interactions (responses/actions) with them, which could contribute to an unpleasant experience, which you then use to confirm your bias (thought).
So, no more excuses. Let’s fix those divisive thoughts, shall we?
Steps To Confronting Biases
- Realize that you are not inherently or morally superior.
We tend to classify groups of people as right/wrong, good/bad, which feeds into an Us vs Them mentality. We consider Them inferior to Us since our way of living is “best”. News flash: it isn’t, and humans transcend such simple categorization. Don’t push your standards and ideals onto others; don’t assume that your way of doing things is universally realistic or suitable. - Consider your influencing factors.
What messages did you get about different demographics from your:
Family? Community? Religious institution? The media you consume? When we’ve been surrounded by negative messages from others about certain groups of people, we may (sub)consciously adopt these opinions as our own without discretion. Understanding the origin of our biases/attitudes can help us dismantle them. - Identify what makes you uncomfortable/unsure about “other” groups.
A difference in spirituality? Traditions they practice? Something they *might* do/not do? Get specific on your who’s, what’s, and why’s. More often than not, like most ignorance, you’ll find your fear have been rooted in the unknown. - QUESTION EVERYTHING.
Understand that all of our assumptions and “truths” can be challenged by disconfirming evidence, so search for it! By remembering that we don’t have all the answers and have been proven wrong by ourselves and others in the past can be a step towards amending our erroneous beliefs. Find ways that you might be wrong in your biases towards others.For example, you may have held the belief that transgender people are a threat to family values. Upon searching for disconfirming evidence, you learn that a mom you respect at your kids’ PTA had been born a male. Now you question yourself: How can she be a threat to family values when you’ve admired her parenting style for years and her children are undoubtedly happy, cared for, and well-adjusted?
- Put Yourself in the Hot Seat.
Consider the negative/inaccurate stereotypes associated with your own culture (not to generate defensiveness, but to humble your own divisive thoughts). There are many people in your demographic(s) that you condemn, and you wouldn’t want their transgressions to be a generalized reflection on you. This will help you remember that your conclusions on an entire group shouldn’t be drawn from the actions of a select few. - Notice positive examples versus exceptions.
Often when looking for positive examples within a group we are biased against, the reaction is to think “well, this person is an exception…” If we use the above example, it would be crucial to understand that this mom on the PTA isn’t an exception to your biased assumption. With a mind open to noticing, you will be flooded with positive examples. - Expose yourself!
No, flashing your goodies probably won’t be of help here (there’s a time and place). Expose yourself to people and situations that are outside of your homogenous bubble. While we may feel more comfort among people who are just like us, certain wisdom is only achievable when we step outside of our echo chambers. Listen to a different news source, maybe even from a different country. Work to expand your social circle to be more inclusive. Watch Bollywood films, check out a festival held at the Islamic Center on campus, read a book that takes place in Guatemala, introduce yourself to the new immigrant family who just moved in down the street. Variety is the spice of life, so strive for more. - Empathy. Empathy. Empathy.
We can build empathy towards others by facing the unfamiliar. Take a walk in someone else’s shoes/skin to gain better insight as to why they act or think the way that they do. Your reality is shaped by the culture you were brought into, as well as the culture you align with, which is the foundation to your ideas, opportunities, norms, and choices. Ask people who have very different backgrounds from yours about their history, perspectives, customs, and listen without trying to persuade or debate. This will increase the quality and quantity of your diverse interactions and will expand your comfort level. With empathy, we can find commonalities with just about anyone, and we can come to appreciate some of our differences.
Summary
We are all vulnerable to biases, but needn’t excuse them. Understanding that biases (like many flawed thinking patterns) are absorbed through external influences can offset the blame or guilt that discourages people from this kind of self-exploration. We may not have chosen to adopt certain biases as our own, yet it is our responsibility to address them, work through the (often uncomfortable) steps, to experience the world through myriad perspectives.
Sources:
The support of empowerment coaching can help you...
Initiate essential life transitions ~ Build resilience through experiences ~ Harness your inner resources ~ You can schedule a free 20 minute call to go over your goals and get you started!
Categories
Blooming Jasmine
+ Empowerment Coach + Hypnosis Practitioner + Social Worker +TEFL/TESOL
If you’d like to go a step further in this area with the help of coaching, visit my page and book your free discovery call to learn more about my services. Don’t forget to subscribe for newsletters, and share some love if you found this helpful.
